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Trauma-informed astrology

How often do you hear passing comments such as “they’re unlucky in XYZ” or “they’re not meant for ABC”? These comments remain in our subconscious mind, even when they’re not necessarily about us. It begins to create an undercurrent, a window of possibility that perhaps that’s true and cemented for life.

Now imagine going to a coach, therapist or trusted person to hear them say that directly to you about something you’ve been struggling with. Does that become a doomsday moment that goes on repeating in your mind throughout your days?

When seeking guidance for situations in our lives, that moment of vulnerability needs to be placed in capable hands. Having someone that can help us spot our blindspots and growth areas is extremely valuable. Having someone that lights the fire over an existing burn however, not so much.

Here are a couple of important guidelines to follow as someone who offers guidance to others (and something to watch for when you are receiving such guidance). For one thing, stay away from destined-doom phrasing. For example, let’s say someone has a very challenged 7th house. Rather than saying giving an unthoughtful conclusion such as “you are unlucky in love”, a more empowered framework may be something like “some of your greatest lessons may come through love and partnerships, and therefore you can find great strength and evolution by being mindful of those lessons or themes”. Secondly, how often do we assume and sum-up what we think someone’s experience of a situation is based on our own familiarity or experience of that topic? On one hand it’s a well-meaning function to be able to create connection and relate more to our fellow humans. When left unchecked, it can become a projection that doesn’t apply to the person in front of us.

The language we use and the gentleness we exude while offering guidance to someone is important. As a professionally appointed guide/coach/mentor etc there is an added layer of responsibility to have awareness and compassion in our interactions. Of course, no one is perfect and any person will have a moment of unawareness. In these cases, self-compassion is the mode to follow.

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